Bounderies, people, bounderies

Okay, so my main man and I are trying out this thing that I call Poly-lite. It's not true polyamoury, because our secondary partners aren't really going to be full partners in our lives. We have children, and they always always come first in our lives.

Now personally, I think every single couple that practices poly have their own set of rules and what may be poly for them is not for someone else and vice versa. It's like that in the swinger community, too. Some couples are full swap only, some are soft swap only, some play in separate bedrooms, some only play together. My main man and I love the group experience, but we find it very hard to find a couple where all four of us feel a connection with each other. Finding two people that both of us are totally into, and both of them are totally into both of us, well, that's the Holy Grail, people. We're still looking, though!

On this path of self-discovery, we've both discovered we don't want to have sex with others just to have sex. We have a very awesome sex life between just the two of us, and having sex just to have sex with other people seems very cheap to us. We've moved beyond our college years, thank the IPU.

Which is why we've made this journey into the poly world.

But guys, my main man and I have rules. And these rules, they can't be broken. EVER. If we break a rule that we made, we knowingly and willingly damage our marriage. I've done that before, and I REFUSE to do it ever again.

Now, I try not to be a mean person and lead people on. I really don't like that. I like to state my rules at the beginning of the encounter. If I say something is not allowed, just because you think I kiss like an angel (which I do, thanks!), that does NOT mean I will give in and relax my boundaries.

A warning: the more you push, the farther I back away.

However, there is absolutely no apology necessary, and if you try to give me one, I will smack you silly.

Part of the reason my online guy (still gotta figure out a name for him, dammit) and I haven't done anything more than flirt heavily online is because of boundaries that I have. Someday the boundaries will change, and our "relationship" will move to a new level. But until that day, I'm just going to soak up the best compliment I have ever received, and let him continue looking for porn that features girls that look like me! I may even go and try to find some for him!

Speaking of porn, I got a lovely package from Freddy & Eddy yesterday! We haven't had a chance to watch Matt and Khym: Better than Ever yet, but it's on the agenda for tonight! YUM!