A few months ago, TMAME signed us up for the local swinger's Halloween party. I was not really looking forward to this, did he not remember the New Years Eve party? And every party we'd gone to prior? Besides, we were going to NEW YORK CITY, just a week after Halloween! But I said "I don't care" and "That's fine" and went along.
Now, there are two groups of swingers in our town. There's the Nascar crowd, and there's the Smug Urban Hipster crowd. And they're both fucked up in the head.
No one seems to have a secure enough relationship to actually show affection or flirt with someone not their spouse. Everyone waits until 2am before they actually show any interest in having sex with you, and then it's just a big orgy. Not that there's anything wrong with that...
But there's no real connection. TMAME and I have a rule that has served us very well in the swinger lifestyle. We only sleep with people that we could be friends with. We won't necessarily be their friends, but the possibility *must* be there. We just can't do random hook-ups without some sort of 'click' or spark between everyone.
My friend KC put it very well over on his last blog post (yes, he needs to blog more, he's fucking brilliant, but he recently got himself married and is disgustingly happy with my best friend now):
In the end though, it’s a meaningless distinction. Lots of married couples “play”, and without the need to create an exclusive “in crowd”. Fuck buddies? Common among single people. One night stands? Common as well. Funny, I don’t see much of it in the lifestyle crowd.
It didn’t become painfully obvious until I met a few people that really did swing. It was, hey, let’s have fun. Not, hey, let’s go to silly parties drink expensive martinis and pretend we are cool because we are secretly openly doing what so many other people are”.
So, at the end of the day, you have a group of people that like to brag about having fuck buddies and don’t do much else, and to me… well, that’s LAME.
In conclusion: If you don't understand the awesomeness that is Dr. Horrible, well, you probably won't get our sense of humor. (ONE fucking person out of two hundred knew who Captain Hammer was! ONE!)
Now we just need to get over our introvertness and get more involved in the kink community here. It's gotta be way more fun.
3 comments:
"there are two groups of swingers in our town ... the Nascar crowd, and there's the Smug Urban Hipster crowd."
First, this bit made me giggle. Second, I never thought there would be significant intersection between NASCAR enthusiasts and swingers. Foolish me. :)
lol It's not so much "nascar" as it is the two extremes between the blue collar and the smug "look at me at how beautiful I am" crowd.
Where are the people who have a variety of interests? Why do they have to be extreme?
I'll be snarky for a moment and say "The people with a variety of interests are all poly." ;) But I'm sure that's not true.
In all seriousness, I don't know. Maybe they don't socialize with the "recognized" (I hesitate to say "public") swinger groups? Maybe they've already got a circle of friends they're interested in playing with, and aren't looking for more.
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